Random Thoughts

Well, I was originally going to sit down and give a bit of a “Recap of 2011″, but, I don’t think I will. I realized I don’t often work on my blog, nor am I taking advantage of my other web-identities. Well…that made me really think. So, since it’s a New Year’s Post, and those are always rife with the dreaded RESOLUTIONS, here I go!

Resolutions for 2012:
1. Get Organized: Including, but not limited to, my crafting space, my workshop, my computer, my house.
2. Start working on the various online entities I have established. I meant to start a Vlog called “Beneath the Oak” this last year, but house projects shafted that…getting that off the ground, along with figuring out where I’m headed with Phoenix Wynd, both design and selling site-wise, are the priorities.
3. Self-sustainable food prep/processing. This one is actually my big one. I’ve been talking about learning how to do some things to reduce the amount of prepared foods we purchase among family for a while now…well, 2012 is the year I stop talking and start DOING. On that note, I’m going to read the bread books I got, that talk about how you can always have fresh bread if you just take 5 mins a day to work on things. I’m going to read my canning book, I’m going to actually figure out how we can get our garden planted, and I’m going to actually do some of the big cooking weekends that will mean we have frozen dinners prepackaged, and spend time learning to make simple things we like to eat, such as pasta and pierogies. That way, we won’t be spending money on prepped foods, and thus we’ll be saving money.
4. Loose a little bit of weight, or at least figure out how to get on a healthier eating plan. I acknowledge that this is probably the resolution most likely to fail to a point…but I have to at least try. I’m probably 60 – 70 pounds over what is healthy for my frame, so I need to at least find a starting point. I realize that I have nearly zero self-discipline, and I might need to get actual help for this…be it Weight Watchers, or my doctor or whatever…but it’s something that I at least need to put into some sort of consideration. I think, with my other resolution to stop relying on prepacked, quick foods, I might be able to work this one in without too much stress. Maybe I’ll simply turn it to a resolution to spend X minutes doing any physical activity, even if it’s just spend time on the Kinect! SOMETHING to get me moving in the right direction.
OH well…At least I’ve put thought to paper, so to speak.

Happy New Years, everyone!
~!Gypsy out…I’m falling asleep at my keyboard here!

Not surprising, really, as I’m notoriously bad at this sort of thing.

As of my last post, we were planning on starting a diet/exercise thing for the New Year. That got derailed rather quickly by the major house project of the year, the Spring Bathroom Remodel…which has lingered on into Summer. And will probably be finished this fall! However, it was a MASSIVE project so I’m not surprised we burned out before the details were completed. After all, it was a total redo. From subfloor up. Old tile and walls out, new stuff in (hired a pro for that…we’re not stoopid). New Tub, new toilet, new sink, new mirror, new light, new cabinet. All of it. Paneling up on the walls, along with a sponge effect, due to bad paintable wallpaper. It was a massive undertaking. Now we just need to do trim, an access panel and frame in a set of shelves. And that can wait. Really, it can. We can use the bathroom, so no big deal.

However, September is looking like it’s going to be SEW-tember, because though I’ve been planning for it, I haven’t done anything on my October costume. I have to run a test of the cloak pattern, which will become a s-i-s’s Yule gift, but after that…I have a cape, a hood/yoke, an overskirt and potentially a bodice to sew up. Not to mention adding trim to a dress I bought from the thrift store, and making a few pouches to go with things. Also, I need to hem up a mask, possibly with some flexible wire worked into it. And maybe either make or trim gloves. I’m hoping to get the majority of things done pretty quick, esp now that I have a fairly sturdy spare table to work on. The cloak test I’m starting this week. There are some parts that I’ll need a more experience sewer/crafter’s opinion on, but Mom-in-law always tells me that if I have a project with a problem, to ask her. I see at least one weekend being spent in Punxsutawney area, if not two, since this whole thing needs slapped together by Oct 1st!

Oh well, nothing much more going on.

~~Gypsy out.

…many sizes…and hit at the least favorable time!
So, my frustrations right now are all monetary. And they all spring from one source. STUPID BOROUGH! We got hit with a delinquent trash bill by the Borough’s collection agency, which totally screwed our budget right now b/c they weren’t willing to work with us. WHO in their RIGHT MIND thinks it’s a good idea to hit ppl over the head with big bills RIGHT AROUND THE HOLIDAYS!? I mean, god above, talk about SCROOGE!
That coupled with our cats both needing a trip to the vet means that no only is our Xmas/Yule budget GONE, but our grocery money for next week is currently standing at $20. And I’m stuck with a lingering, annoying cough that I can’t get looked at until after Xmas b/c we can’t afford any meds that might be required.
I sort of hate this. I hate it enough that I’m actively starting to plan how I can get back into some form of semi-regular employment.
Phoenix Wynd is sort of on hiatus, at least until we can get my shop and craft area organized enough for me to be able to work. I’ve got some little stuff to post, but nothing major. *SIGH*

Hey, Powers That Be? Can I send Lethargy and Procrastination back in trade for Motivation and Ambition? PLEASE?

We’re planning on starting a diet and exercise regime come January…mainly because neither of us are stupid enough to try that with the holidays!
Maybe I can get back into my size 14′s by summer! Fighting fit would be nice, too, actually.

Some friends and I are doing some research into putting together a mostly-traditional Gypsy clan for Ren Faires and stuff. We’ve got some ideas about Vardos, tents, and what not. The next bit of research is probably going to be into dress, and tasks…like what handcrafts were they known for, how the camp jobs were divided, that sort of stuff.

My Tony, my Uber-geek got a HUGE windfall recently, which puts a brand new techie toy in my reach. He got chosen for the beta tests of the ChromeOS Laptop by Google! We’ve been playing with it from time to time, while we figure out exactly what we can use it for…beyond a really quick email/chat machine. Dunno…but it’s a SWEET looking piece of equipment.

Oh well, not much more to say, so GYPSY OUT.

Well, Ladies and Gentlemen, sorry about the long break in Blogging. I’m not very good at keeping something like this up.

So, it’s October. And those of you who know me know this means it’s my seasonal job. If you happen to pop over to Captain Skully’s Curse during Phantom Fright Nights at Kennywood Park (www.phantomfrightnights.com), you’ll probably see an undead wench lurking along the line, or you might be one of the lucky groups that go through while I’m working Head of House! Either way, you’ll see me there! Unfortunately, I’m not permitted to give any photos or details of my work, so I’ll just stop this topic here.

Phoenix Wynd has been open for business since Sept 1st, but I haven’t had any sales yet. Granted, I need to keep posting new things, but I’m sort of discouraged. I don’t want to keep making things to post if nothing sells b/c then I’m stuck with a whole bunch of stuff and nothing to do with it. Hmph…but if I don’t keep posting things, then I won’t pop up on the top of the searches or the front page a lot, which will reduce my chances of selling. It’s a catch 22, I think. OH well.

As soon as the rain drifts off, we’ll start the fall weeding and organizing of things for winter lockdown. I’m also hoping to get a friend’s dad to come by and give us some advice on the bathroom.

Oh well, nothing much else, so, gypsy out.

…though, isn’t everyone, by now?

Why am I waiting for Spring, you ask? Well, it’s simple. Spring is when the garage is going to become our wood shop. Now, why do we need a wood shop? For two very good reasons. First off, we are fully capable of building such things as a corner china closet, desk hutch, even the desks we need. The only reason we never did such things in the past was lack of space to work. We have the space here. It just needs organized. But, to organize the garage, we need to sort and organize the shed…and to do that, we need warm weather.

The second reason we need a wood shop is PhoenixWynd. Yes, I can hear those who know what that means going “Why do you need a wood shop for PhoenixWynd?” Well, because as of this Spring, thanks to the permission granted by my loving elder s-i-s…PhoenixWynd, Aromatherapy and Accessories is about to become Phoenix Wynd Designs. See, I’m taking up small-scale woodworking, and other such pursuits. Things like keepsake boxes, prop wands, fairy doors, jewelry boxes, and such. Might eventually upgrade into things like puzzles and puzzle boxes, inlay boxes, and such as I get the tools and technique books. I’m also planning on continuing with some of my leather-working and Jewelry making. All of this will become an Etsy shop and maybe a roving craft-show store. Maybe even end up working a Ren Faire some day in the future. I’ve been reminded that I do best when working with my hands…so I think this is a good venture for me. Especially since one good piece of wood can crank out probably four projects! I’m going to start with small stuff; prop wands, fairy doors, a few little keepsake boxes, things that won’t need a lot of wood or hardware. If I work up from there, I’ll be very happy. Hubby has agreed to take care of the drafting part of any of my personal designs, as I have no skill for figuring out blueprints. So, we’ll see come summer!

The house is putzing along…as we slowly figure out where to store things until we have places to unpack certain things. This weekend, we’re planning on reorganizing the living room seating arrangement, due to issues with the current layout. You would think with a honking big plasma tv, we would be ok to sit across the room. For movies and stuff, we are, but we use the living room mainly for the Xbox…and we can’t see text on the screen from where the couch is. In order to fix that, we’re going to pull it forward, and leave a sitting area in the back corner.

Well, speaking of video games, I’ve recently gotten a bit hooked on a Facebook ap game called “Realm of Empires”. The game is pretty cool…build up your town, eventually take over other towns and build yourself an empire. The only downside is the occasional bouts of testosterone from those who think it is a war game and not a stragety game. *Sigh* I think I’m doing ok. I have my main village, a bolt-hole village way off to the one side of my map, and another village I just snagged. I’m working on tagging yet another village. I don’t take them from player characters…just the computer. But I won’t bore anyone with more detail.

Oh, I’m trying something new this time around. Hubby has convinced me to podcast this as well as blog, so later today, I’ll be recording it and adding the recording to the blog…so if you’d rather just listen to me babble instead of read it, you can.

I discovered last night that I can no longer drink cola of any sort. I had a 20 oz bottle of my favorite, Pepsi, spread out through the day yesterday, and ended up with horrible insomnia, stomach aches, and overheating. I didn’t sleep until after 4 am. So, not going to indulge in that again.

I’ll be starting my BESM game up in two weeks, I hope. I’d placed it on hiatus for the holidays…but I guess I can pull it out again. The boys are happy to hear it, but I’m not sure I’ll be up to it completely. Over a month away from DM’ing a game makes it difficult to come back, especially when you broke in the middle of a session’s plans. Though, I keep fairly detailed notes, both of my planned activity in a session, and what the company did. I should be ok, once I go back through those notes. We’ll see what the guys think, I guess. And I should probably get around to stating out the final dungeon’s enemies and the last big bad guy. Hmph. DM’ing is work sometimes.

Speaking of work, I’ve decided that letting my muse flitter about like a hummingbird on speed doesn’t help me in the slightest. So, I’ve randomly chosen a story, a fanfic of mine, to focus on. I will keep notes of ideas that come for other stories, but I will only be working on that one story. Until it’s completed, or the characters turn into cockroaches and slither under the furniture in my head. Who knows?

Well, that seems to be all I can think of, so I’ll sign off here. I should probably go get the kitchen cleaned up so I can cook tonight.

~Gypsy out.

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

Yeah…sorry about that. I’ve been busy. I mean, I guess. Apathetic, too, actually. Oh well.

First off, Happy Thanksgiving…at least for those of you in the world who celebrate Thanksgiving.

It’s been a weird couple of months. September was fairly quiet, I think, I honestly can’t remember. October, unfortunately was close to hell on wheels…but…it had its up sides.
I got a part-time Job at Kennywood Park for their Phantom Fright Nights…working one of the haunts. My health wasn’t 100% up to working again, nevermind working in a haunted house trying to scare people…as that equals 6-7 hours on your feet a night, starting in the evening. I don’t think I actually spent any time with Hubby during the weekends…because the ONE weekend I didn’t work, I was in Ohio for my S-i-s’s birthday. It was nice to get out and meet new people…and sometimes the fluff’s screams were nice. And having a little bit of my own money was fun. But, I’ll have to be in significantly better shape before I do that again! However, as Luna’s wedding is October, and I’m hoping to loose at least 40 lbs for that, if not 45-50, then I very well MAY be in significantly better shape. Hm…that’s something to mull over.

There have been a few improvements to the house. Hubby updated the Kitchen floor, and we got the gas line run, and the stove installed. Cooking and baking are both MUCH more enjoyable. We haven’t updated the damaged and aged counter-tops yet, because we’re still going over our options there. At this current moment, we’re talking about doing a full DIY project, with backer-board, tile, and food-safe resin. We’re still doing research on that. I’d like to take a drive down to Construction Junction soon, but we sort of need to get past the holiday first.

We took advantage of a holiday sale this week, but not for a gift. We acquired a Kitchen Aide Stand Mixer (Classic Plus version) for the house. They were on sale at Macy’s, so we tagged one.

My Mixer

I used it today to make pumpkin bread for the trip to the in-laws tomorrow…and WOW, did it speed up the process.

Anyways…I really don’t have much more to talk about…so I’ll sign off here.
~Gypsy out.

Where to start? Hmm, I’m not sure.

The sewer issue has been repaired. Granted, it was a bigger job than the plumber expected, but it still got done. AND, he did NOT crank the price when the job got more complicated. He looked at the estimate he gave us before and went with that. Which was awesome.

Unfortunately, now we have a mound of dirt in place of a flowerbed. Which isn’t too bad as the silly thing was nothing but weeds, but we still need to grade and level it! Oh well…maybe we’ll get a day soon that isn’t blazing stinking hot so we can work on it.

Speaking of Blazers, we were trying to sell our Blazer-dragon recently. Well, that didn’t EXACTLY work out as planned.We ended up trading her in at the Murray’s Dealership.

Good bye, old dragon!

She was a good truck for us in the beginning, but she just wasn’t practical anymore. I feel bad still, because it was my first car and I grew attached to it over the 4 years we had it. This picture is the last I took of it, right before we were taking it up to be traded in. We got a good price for it, and it WASN’T being clunker-ed…mainly b/c it was being used to buy a used car, not a new car. So, the old Blazer-dragon isn’t dead, just sent to find a new family that needs her.

Our new vehicle is an ’07 Ford Focus. I know! I went ON and ON about how I couldn’t STAND driving hubby’s Focus. But, mine is a hatchback! And with a different seat arrangement, it’s actually really easy for me to drive. We took the two hour ride up to DuBois (B/c Dad-in-law works for the sister-dealership to the one we bought from, meaning we got a family discount…worth the 2 hours!) to trade in the Blazer and buy the Focus.
She’s been given the nickname of Pixie by Momma T…and we’ve adapted that to be “Foca-pixie”, much like Hubby’s car is “Foca-kitty”.

Meet the Foca-pixie!

And yes, that red thing in the lower corner is the Foca-kitty.  Hubby is happy that I got a Focus…and he’s amused by the fact that my last vehicle was “silver” and now I’ve got another silver car.

In other news, I’m going back to my chiropractor this week, after nearly two months off. Oh well, I was getting weird pains and stiff. Also, on the health topic, Hubby has convinced me to give Curves another chance, now that my surgery is healed enough for my flexibility to be back enough to actually do the exercises. I’m too sedentary, and my weight is starting to creep up towards “unhealthy”. Granted, I’m not the sort to really complain about having a bit extra in places, but when it starts wandering into potential health complications, it’s time to reassess one’s lifestyle. Hubby says he’ll find a way to pay for it, if it’s something that can get me healthier. I guess, in the long run, paying a gym membership is better than a few hundred thousand in hospital bills if something were to go completely to shit. Tomorrow I’m going to see if they have a trial membership and how much the numbers really are.

Let’s see…I’m writing a bit, still…and one of my stories is attempting to turn itself into a comic book, Photoshop style. Luckily, I just upgraded to Photoshop Elements 7, from an outdated version of regular Photoshop. There was a sale, apparently. I’m also editing a few things. Just got done with the full “grammar-trixing” of one s-i-s’s book. (Trixing refers to editing for grammar. The title “Grammartrix” was once given to me in a review response…and it stuck. It’s something like a Dominatrix, but  with Grammar…LOL.) Anyways…another S-i-s is tossing her book upon my tender mercy, and I get to whip it into shape. *Snap*I enjoy helping my sisters with a skill that I possess and they don’t, but I couldn’t do it for a living…I’d kill someone, probably some whiny author who can’t understand why their book needs to have one verb tense instead of three!

Well, beyond all that, my social life has picked up a little bit…a Big Eyes, Small Mouth (BESM) game that I planned to be One session is now heading into it’s fourth, with a fifth to come. The boys are enjoying it, and I’m having a bit of fun working it all out…so it’s all good.

In addition to that, I’ve started designing my own game system…but I’m not sure how well it will run…haven’t gotten to the point of play-testing yet. I’ll laugh myself all the way to the bank if that silly little thing ends up making me money, as I’m truly doing it to make my own gaming easier. BESM’s fun, but it has its limits. I’ve taken that as a starting point, and are fleshing things out. I just hope it doesn’t get as complicated as D&D! Urgh. That would suck. Oh well…only time will tell!

Well, aside from the fact that I’m Lord Crusader in Oblivion, thanks to the Knights of the Nine quest-line, nothing else is going on. And I just remembered I have towels that need to go in the dryer, so Good Night, world!

…if anyone cares.

Over the years, I’ve been working to develop a low-effort, high-yield fairly tasty basic pasta sauce. I consider it a “Pantry Recipe” b/c everything needed for the sauce is something I stock in my pantry. I’ve decided to share with the world at large…so here goes.

Ingredients:
1 medium to large onion – diced
2 medium cloves garlic – minced (Dried garlic powder 1 tsp, or pre-minced garlic 2 tsp. work too.)
1 pound ground meat (If you use 1/2 pound, the sauce has more tomato flavor…almost a marinara consistency. For a marinara, cut the meat out, but add some olive oil.)
1 14.5-oz can diced tomatoes – do not drain!
1 15-oz can tomato sauce
1 6 oz can tomato paste
~ 1-2 tsp Basil, Oregano, Marjoram
~ 1/2 tsp savory
~ 2-3 tsp parsley
Dash of sugar – optional
Dash of Red Wine – optional
Salt and pepper to taste
Olive oil – optional

Steps:
Start by mixing the tomato sauce and paste in a bowl. Add dried herbs and sugar and set aside. Mix Onion, Garlic and Ground meat, brown over medium high heat, adding Olive Oil if meat is not able to give enough grease to keep from sticking to pan. If there’s too much grease, either push the meat to the sides and cook it out, or drain after meat is browned. When meat is almost 100% done, splash in the red wine of your choice if you’re using it. (The sweeter reds will enable you to cut the extra sugar. Dryer reds might require more sugar or something to cut the bitterness). If you’re not using wine, dump the undrained tomatoes into the pot. (If you do use wine, drain the tomatoes enough to match the wine added.) Simmer a bit until the tomatoes are warm, then mix in the sauce blend. Bring up to temp, and if it’s too thin, either cook it down a bit, or add some grated Parmesan cheese. If it’s too thick, splash in some more wine and cook the alcohol out.

And enjoy!

…I’m still alive. Occassionally in pain, but still here.

The move went…somewhat out of control…but everything that needed acomplished was; so no harm, no foul.

There’s no date set for the plumbing issue in the new house to be fixed, as we’re waiting on a tax addendum. The IRS isn’t known for getting back to someone quickly, after all. Especially when an amendment to a return is put through that would give the person more money. Hopefully, it gets processed quickly, and we’re able to fix the sewage pipe soon.

Got some boxes moved around, thanks to a friend stopping by. Unpacking is going slowly, but it is moving forward. We’ll be reogranizing the Living room soon. After Tony gets paid next, we’re going to hopefully start getting finishing touches like curtains and blinds. I don’t mind if we have to get them a room at a time, so long as we get them. Because of the color scheme in the Living room, we’re looking at hunter green accents. I’m thinking cream for the Dining room…and maybe the stairwell windows, too. Dark blue for the bedroom, and probably a steel gray for the computer room. The Bathroom is right now in a state of “Fugly”, so we can pretty much go with whatever we want. I want Turquoise…a nice jewel tone, that will mesh well with the colors we will eventually be painting in there. (Shades of light gray, btw. And the tiles will eventually be a natural color…just not sure how dark, b/c we’re not planning that just yet.)

Our main “upgrade” concern is a temporary measure to get enough storage in the kitchen…b/c well, I’m running out of room! I have absolutely NO WHERE to store my bread and ceral! We’re looking into our options and will probably pick a temporary measure to purchase around next payday.

Got back into Guild Wars now that my nomad friend has obtained both the game, and Skype. In fact, with a little begging, I managed to get my level 20 Ascended-Infused Character’s last piece of Elite Armor…15k a piece, but well worth it, in both prestige and looks! Unfortunately, I need to RE-Infuse her before she wanders out to face Titans or Mursaat, *Sigh*. Good thing I’m back in Ascalon working on a new Necro character! And playing the Nightfall expansion. I have three low-level characters I’m developing, actually. My newest is a Necro/Mesmer, then there’s my Elementalist/Necro and my Necro/Elementalist. Yes, I know, I’ve done that before…but the 2nd N/E is going to be a Curses/Ice Mage instead of a Blood/Fire Mage like my Level 20 N/E. As of right now, I’m planning on running the E/N as an Air mage, probably with Death Magic or Blood Magic backup. The N/Me is going to be a Hex mage all around…with maybe a flicker of Blood to reduce her reliance on Monks. So, I’m looking at Curses and Domination magic, mainly. And I’m probably boring any non-player who might read this.

Looking forward to getting some of the gardening started on our new house, but I’m well aware it doesn’t rank as a true priorty, but more like a distraction. Yes, we want the place to look better, so the neighbors aren’t pissy, but really, we have to get unpacked and organized inside before we do outside. And that includes the pipes.

I’m not able to get my season pass to the pool up the street, but I don’t think I’d be using it much this summer. I am going to try and go at least once a week when it gets warm enough to swim, but first I need to get a swim top to fit my new chest. (And one of these days, I need to get my before/after pics together and posted somewhere.) I’m also hoping to find a yoga studio around here that’s not too expensive or far, b/c I was actually doing good when I was doing yoga. It was an exercise class I was upset to miss. I’ll have to start with the lowest they offer, though, b/c I’m still way out of whack. Almost three years of back troubles that made it hard to walk, let alone exercise has left me woefully out of shape, not to mention the fact that I’m still not 100% bounced back from the surgery and my back isn’t 100% back up to snuff, I’ll have to take it a step at a time.

Wow, nearly 1 AM already? yeah, time to sign out.

TTYL, world.

~Gypsy Out

WARNING, RANT AHEAD! *DEEP breath in, HOLD, DEEP breath out.*

As you guys know, I’m buying a house, and as part of that, we’re trying to unload the unnecessary in our lives. Material things, extra bills, emotional baggage, all of it. Now, as those who’ve been acquainted with me long enough know, I have a fairly adversarial relationship with my family; fueled by the massive amount of mental and emotional anguish established by their callous disregard for my feelings as a human being. As part of my effort to release some of that, I am not planning on telling them I’ve moved, or if they learn that much, where to exactly. The other thing I decided to do was to remove a major physical reminder of my life with them. To whit, my mother gave me her dinning room set when she left to live with my sister. The china closet, large table, and six chairs are over-sized for the house we live in now, never mind the new house!

(Here’s where “Fair play” bit my butt, gang!)

The idea was voiced to offer the items up on Freecycle, in an effort to remove them from my house. However, I didn’t feel comfortable simply dropping the items into the world at large without first giving my mother a chance to reclaim them. After all, they were part of her past, her marriage house (Though, after that divorce, why she’d want to cling to them is beyond me!) Also, I was afraid that if I got rid of them, and then they heard of it in the future, I’d end up in court over a dinning room set bought in the 70′s. (Knowing current depreciation values of such things, I think they’d win a whopping $125, if that!)

I wasn’t expecting a response, frankly…but to be safe, I had hubby send the email from one of his not-often-checked “Spaam” accounts. Instead of either getting an email moaning about how I could get rid of these things or anything, I get ambushed by BOTH parents. BOTH! Frankly, my father wouldn’t piss on my mother if she was on fire, and the feeling is mutual. The idea that Mom called Dad to have him call me is boggling the mind.

But, it was the same old running in circles, they couldn’t understand why I could be upset, why I didn’t talk to them, why I didn’t care…how can I be so hard? How could I be so angry…and the classic “You’re going to need someone to be there for you one of these days, and the way you’re going, you’re not going to have anyone!”

* Rant *

This coming from the man who sued to cut off child support while I was still in early college, thus ELIMINATING my grocery money ENTIRELY. This coming from the man who told me I was greedy and lazy for asking him to buy me a few pairs of Wal-mart jeans and a pair of tennis shoes after I watched him send my sister to the mall school year after school year with his CREDIT CARDS and NO SUPERVISION! From the man who didn’t even tell me WHY he wasn’t coming to my Vow Renewal, just RSVP’d Negative, and never even sent a card! Who told me the only reason I was having a pagan ceremony was to “Stir up controversy and make drama”. That my faith was a “Phase”, despite the fact that I have considered myself a Pagan since 1998…earlier actually, as I allowed classmates in High School to freely call me a witch without contradicting them, and told the teachers multiple times that I didn’t believe in organized religion.

And the sob story from my mom about not knowing that my brother-in-law was saying hurtful, hateful things WHEN SHE SAID HE HAD THE RIGHT TO HIS OPINION on the phone to me. What about my right to be treated as a human being with the RIGHT to choose my own religion? Or my RIGHT to have MY Vow Renewal that WE were paying for HOW we wanted with Who we wanted there or not?

And nevermind the fact that she spent my entire teen years telling me I was stupid and lazy and worthless. She’s my mother and she loves me, so I should just take all the emotional abuse that she dishes out. It’s okay for her to continually attempt to manipulate me to do what she wants, but when I ask for the common courtsey to work around my schedule or to respect my feelings or wishes about something, I’m being selfish. No matter what is said to me…b/c she’s my mother, I’m supposed to allow her to hurt me. I’m supposed to allow her to brush me aside time and again. I’m unimportant unless it’s to do her bidding. Sorry, I walked away from that years ago. And I don’t plan on going back!

In response to that lovely gem “You’ll need someone.”
Yes…actually, I DID need someone. Recently, I needed help in post-surgery. You want to know what? My sisters-in-spirit all but moved heaven and earth to be there for me!
Packing and organizing for the move? My siblings-in-spirit were there all the way.
Need help painting? Well, my in-laws are making a special trip down to help with that, despite the fact that my mother-in-law has health problems that will make it hard for her to do much painting…but she’s going to be there.
Help moving? Got that covered too.
Help learning a craft? M-i-l’s right there, helping me learn what I need, not telling me I can’t…not telling me I shouldn’t. Helping me figure out mistakes and learn from them. Help with my self-confidence over something trivial (I took up cake decorating, but am critical of the final results…always.). In-laws and in-spirits are there for that.
They’re planning on making a huge stink out of my 30′th birthday because it IS a milestone birthday.
Support system? I talk to my sisters-in-spirit nearly daily. About everything. Hell, I even have them helping me figure out this whole “Write something that ISN’T a fan-fic” thing.

So, I admit, I was naive when I thought that this wouldn’t be opening a whole can of worms. I tried to do the right thing, and ended up with a pounding stress headache. I thought it could be a business transaction. “You want it…you tell us where and when, and we drop it off.” Nothing more. Not these waffling phone conversations that babble endlessly about how they don’t understand…how I’m so cold to them…how I’m not all broken up b/c I haven’t talked to them in months. “What about me?” they wail. It’s BEEN about you jackasses. It’s time that it’s about ME now. And those people I love, who love me for who I am, they agree. From the in-spirit family to the in-laws (just the parents, the rest don’t need to know. Though, they thought it was odd that none of my family were at the Renewal of Vows ceremony that we hosted), They say it’s time I look out for number one…because in this situation, looking after number one means I look after them too…b/c they don’t have to pick up the pieces.

And if those in question see this…well good. Maybe it will show that I’m hurt and I’m angry and I’m finished trying to mend fences that are made out of straw or build bridges out of twine.

~Gypsy out. I got to go defrag. (Though this helped)

* / Rant*